Training a Positive Eye

I’m currently reading a book given to us by Ezen...

New York Times Bestseller “The Five Love Languages”

by Dr. Gary Chapman

Throughout the years I’ve been casually taught on many occasions abt THE “5 love languages”, and also used many parts of it during our marriage counselling sessions... However, reading the book in a quiet corner dawned new light!

A few things I learnt:
TRUE LOVE requires discipline & conscious effort (& the need for personal growth)

Many people fall in and out of love thinking that they’ve stopped loving the other party, without realising that TRUE LOVE goes beyond the emotional lovey-dovey and romanticism.
To make a r/s last, it takes discipline to do things that make the other party tick (speaking their love language) and a conscious effort to keep doing it though it may be unnatural for u to!
Also, true love is giving the person space to do the things that make them grow. Like giving your guy space to play computer games, go fishing, doing the “dude” things so that they can BE HAPPY....!

And in respond,

-> the partner appreciates and is enriched by your effort

-> u get a sense of satisfaction

-> u keep doing it!
So it goes in a cycle... a good healthy cycle of lurrrrvvveeeee..........

Time to refill the love tank!

Love Language #1: WORDS OF AFFIRMATION
The bible says in Prov 12:25: Worry weighs a person down, an encouraging word cheers a person up

How true...! In the book, Dr Chapman wrote “All of us have areas in which we feel insecure. We lack courage and the lack of courage often hinders us from accomplishing the positive things we would like to do.”

When I first started to learn photography, it was the positive encouragement from many friends that affirmed me of my works. And that helped push & motivate me to take more!
So I guess it’s the same for any relationship... When your boyfriend does something nice, praise him! When he does something sweet, give him a pat on the back instead of comparing with other-perfect-men-on-the-earth (ie: male leads in Korean dramas).

Not only do these lessons work in a BGR/marriage relationship, I’m pretty sure these could help me deal with my in-laws, my siblings, my friends too!

I began to reflect if I had been any encouragement at all to anyone, and I find myself beginning to think about the times that I enthusiastically told a friend how good their works are, how I tell Randy that I’m marrying the right man coz he’s faithful & capable (not to mention handsome... hohohoh...) and writing comments in someone else’s blog to tell them “blog more! I’m reading!”...
Are these enough? I think in God’s eye, any amount of encouragement for others will never be enough. Gotta continue to train a positive eye to see others and learn to praise them when they’re at it! ;)

Makeup Woes

I borrowed Yyn's digicam yesterday as I was going to the bridal shop to try on my 4.5 inch high wedding heels with the gown...

Was afraid that the front of my gown may be a lil short after the extra height... (U see, the previous time I tried it on, I couldn't try it with my actual heels as my feet was still suffering from the "trotter-effects" of my sprain) So today I dropped by juz to try it out accompanied by my Queen-of-all-Bridesmaids - Ezen...

Ezen will be the main gurl helping me out with my gown, touching up of my makeup and the nitty-gritty... I'm so happy coz she's really good at all these!

While looking through the photos of the gown in the cam and thinking how I want it modified, guess what I found? Some pics that sis and I took during my trial makeup at the bridal studio from 2 months back!

My eyes look a lil weird coz... It's the return of the eyelid-stickers!

There's a story behind eyelids stickers... U see, when I was a young kid, I did not have double eye lids. My mum who was a beautician back then, stuck these awkward stickers on my eyes every day, in the hope that I would have BIG eyes and double eyelids like hers... (of coz i wld fidget n peel it off when she's not looking... :P)

Mum and her big eyes...

Some of my friends have even heard of the episode of mum rubbing my head with hard liquor coz I had such little hair when I was a baby. And the nose-bridge pinching every night to make sure I would have a sharp nose.... All the old wife tales........ tsktsktsk...........

(clearly, non of the method works.... Though my mum would like to think otherwise n remind my sis how much the stickers wld haf worked for her if she had listened....... -_- )

Anyhows, for the entire afternoon I felt like I was 5 years old again, waiting for the right moment to peel the sticker off my eyes... and FYI, falsies were not included yet..... I tried on the falsies on a separate occasion and u can bet my last buck that I was EXTREMELY uncomfortable....

See how un-natural my eyelids look?!!?!?

Well, I guess I can only tell myself that I should be thankful I've been trained at a young age to tahan such "vain-pain"!!!!! PUI! hahahaha......

My unconventional wedding

Just had a makan session with our wedding coordinators (Joe & Irene Chow!) and we discussed so much till we ran out of stuff to discuss....! (Actually we were more preoccupied playing with their 2 hyperactive Schnauzers).. :P

Joe & Irene

We covered issues from "how NOT to get your angpows hijacked halfway" to "where and how can I toss my bouquet to single girls".... Every weddings has something unique or unconventional either in the proceedings or the dressing.... Joe aptly pointed out how unconventional my wedding is going to be:

1) The bride will walk down the aisle on her own
- no nervous kids, no bride's father, just me myself and I down that lane...

2) There are no pre-wedding photos of me in my actual gown

- I figured that I'll be stuck in that gown the entire day on 11th July and will be having plenty of pics in it. So why show it beforehand?

- A friend who's getting married 2 weeks after mine hasn't even seen his bride-to-be in her gown. That's how special!!!!!!!!!!!

3) Sleep late on the Actual Day and wake up at 9am

- Okay, maybe 8am since i need an hour to makeup. But it helps that I'm not Teochew and I hope to sleep in as much as possible... (Can there be a lazier bride than me?!)

Maybe it's my perspective about the wedding... I look it at as a birthday-party of sort... Just a happy gathering-together of people I've not met for a long time and people I've known for a while now... It's probably gonna be an event that my guests remember and talk about for at most a week? and probably a month extra for me and Randy. So nuttin to be too sweaty about... Afterwards it's marriage life, baby! ;)